Fierce grace

And Ghandi also said “god demands nothing less than complete self surrender as the price for the only real freedom that is worth having”. And when a person does looses self, that person immediatelly finds self in service of all that lives. Such service becomes his delight and recreation or re-creation. He is a new man or she is a new woman never weary of spending himself or herself in the service of god’s creation. And how that manifest into daily life? I went through a period where I felt that my work was to just quiet my mind and open my heart and I took courses and I spent time in India and I meditated and then I felt, I could hear Maharaji saying, Maharaji used to say to me “Ram Dass you shouldn’t be with people very much, you should be alone. You should take your food alone, you should eat alone, you should be alone”. So I went back to the hotel after he said that and I put a sign over my door ‘Do not disturb’ and I stayed in my room. Two days later a couple that was with us had a fight during the night. The next morning they were with Maharaji, Maharaji said “you were fighting?” they said “yes”. And when were you fighting?, “during the night”, well did you go to Ram Dass?, “no, he had a sign do not disturb”. You didn’t go to Ram Dass? He wasn’t there for you? And he looked at me with disgust. And I was about to say that “but Maharaji you said.. I’m supposed to be alone”. And in those conflicting messages, is the message: because at first you have to be alone by pulling back from people, and you do it, and then you pull back, and then you hear Maharaji saying “serve people, feed people” so you come out and then you get stuck in the being with people and you pull back. But you understang what the game is, finally: the game is to be with people and yet always be alone. You always sit, you always rest in your own being. Maharaji said ‘your only friend is god’. And you ultimately stop looking for it out in the world because you’re just busy being, you just are. Then you’re ready to do what needs to be done, your body, and your mind, and your heart, become really instruments of the process.

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